RamonaCreel.com

If there’s one thing I’ve learned after multiple-decades-as-professional-dream-weaver — it’s that I ain’t everybody’s cup-o-noodles. And you know what? This suits me FINE. I’d rather serve ten exactly-what-I’m-looking-for clients (who embrace my problem-solving-resource-finding-ass-kicking approach, prefer brutal-honesty-that-brings-about-change to sugar-coated-intertia, and find my swear-like-a-well-educated-sailor-who-just-got-kicked-out-of-a-whorehouse epithets amusing) than a thousand mismatches.

Wake-Wakey (Or Wakey-Nakey, If You Prefer)

As I teach my wanna-be-better-at-business peeps, successful entrepreneurship is all about finding-then-connecting-with your ideal customer.

But sometimes, the best way to recognize a perfect prospect is to identify the truly craptastic ones, first.

I’m a tell-it-like-it-is gal, so let’s start with a wake-up call about what I require of those who hire me. (The mom-swirling-icewater-over-your-head-as-you-sleep-through-a-ringing-alarm kind — not the bed-partner-poking-you-with-morning-wood type. Guttermind.)

I operate from a place of no-client-left-behind-whether-these-people-like-it-or-not — however, I will occasionally come across an individual that I simply can’t no-matter-what-I-do-help. To be fair, it ain’t never about goal-magnitude or challenge-depth. (‘Cuz hell, I can handle purt-near-anything!) 99.999999999% of the time, the problem is a philosophical disconnect — so-and-so either wants a dealbreaker I’m unwilling to provide, or refuses to engage in some behavior I insist upon from my clients.

These encounters have shown me that you and I are decidedly NOT a good match if you:

• have (at least in your mind) been browbeaten-and-bullied into seeking assistance by a third-party, when you don’t actually feel there’s anything going on in your life that you can’t handle on your own

• habitually blame other people for your frustrations, your failures, your disappointments

• expect all that you want in life will be handed to you mixed-metaphor-gift-wrapped-on-a-silver-platter (and you think Imma give you a fancy-schmancy participation award for just showing up)

• agree things could be better, but are okay staying where you are (‘cuz tolerating is easier than change)

• have acquired some special-snowflake-breed-of-keep-an-epi-pen-handy-at-all-time-to-protect-you-from-anaphylaxis allergy to constructive criticism, and take offense at freaking EVERYTHING

• are waiting for a-spark-a-flash-or-some-other-nebulous-external-concept to strike before you commit

• have become hopelessly addicted to draaaama (pronounced minus the umlaut) to the point that if there’s not enough chaos in your life, you’ll go out and create some to fill the void

• repeatedly cancel or reschedule with next-to-no-notice, like the very soul of consideration

• offer a zillion reasons why any-and-every suggestion won’t work (although you have exactly zero empirical evidence to back this up, ‘cuz you wouldn’t even test said theory before dismissing it)

• never, no-matter-how-easy-or-enjoyable-the-task, seem to complete the assigned homework

• see me as a commodity or a beck-and-call girl or a collection of hours that you’ve purchased — and constantly devalue my work by asking for freebies/discounts or questioning my fees

• refuse to ever consider a different perspective (because you’re the smartest person in the room)

• hope you’ll wake up tomorrow to suddenly discover the perfect life materialized-sans-patience-or-effort around you (don’t laugh — I had a dude once tell me that’s precisely what he wanted)

• start every session from a closed-rigid-defensive posture, unwilling to share, expose, or be vulnerable

When Tab-A Is Built To Fit Slot-B

Now that we’ve got all that neg-head shit out of the way, let’s ac-cen-tu-ate-the-po-si-tive for a moment!

Personal-soul-mate-pairings are based in congruence — shared values, beliefs, interests, goals. The practitioner-client-version of such a romance happens when we’re on the same page about why we’re working together.

Here’s a newsflash — helping-profession relationships (like the ones I have with my clients) are never all-one-sided. These folks don’t hire me to work FOR them, but WITH them. At the end of the day, there’s a whole-hell-of-a-lot-of-give-and-take behind them big-ass-life-changes — it’s gotta collaborative, with both parties contributing.

Keeping that in mind, I was meant for you (and you were meant for me) if you:

• have reached a breaking point, and are flat-out done tolerating (tolerating is what average people do — my ideal client wants something extraordinary)

• have grown tired of spinning-your-wheels-and-going-nowhere-fast — so you’re looking for someone who can ground you, help you gain some traction, and start moving-the-freak-forward

• recognize that everything you want is just outside your comfort zone

• are cool with the fact that lasting-for-realz-improve-your-life change is about giving yourself a long-enough timeline for your brain to actually make a fundamental shift into a new realm of thinking

• understand that thriving means making self-improvement a priority — you feel that you genuinely deserve the best in life and treat self-care like a status symbol (rather than a sign of dysfunction or selfishness)
• are looking to fix the issue, and not just cover it with a bandaid — that means you consider whatever frustration you’re dealing with problematic enough to require immediate concrete change (not just slightly annoying enough that it will make you talk endlessly about how awesome life would be if things got better, but never actually take action)

• are as willing to invest in your own well-being as you are in, say, six-zillion-on-demand-streaming-services or buying-way-too-much-overpriced-food-at-a-mediocre-restaurant-to-celebrate-getting-a-year-older or that-gym-membership-you-keeps-shelling-out-money-for-but-never-using

• recognize the value of change, are prepared to commit fully to it — and see me as an accumulation of skills, talents and holy-crap-that’s-an-amazing-end-result value

• are at the right stage in the game where you’ve moved past change-resistance — you’re no longer waffling, second-guessing, back-tracking, talking yourself out of something you know you’ve been wanting for a long time

• are open to other points of view — are the kind of person who says “yes and” rather than “yes but”

• prefer the occasional affectionately-snarky-yet-nail-right-on-the-head-come-to-jesus-meeting, rather than a yes-woman who’s more concerned about kissing your ass than helping you evolve

• embrace a you-won’t-know-what-you-don’t-know-until-you-realize-you-didn’t-know-it mindset

• understand that I can stick your face in the trough water, but I can’t swallow for you — rather than seeking a magic pill, you’ve rolled up those sleeves and assumed responsibility for your own success

• recognize that you’ve gotta become the best-you-you-can-be, before expecting anyone else to change

• when you picture the problem you’re trying to overcome and envision its solution, think to yourself, “This must change. It must change now. I must change it. I can change it.”

• get that anything worth having requires a substantial investment (of time, effort, money, mental energy) and a fairly sizable bit of sacrifice (of comfort, the status quo, your excuses, all those distractions you’ve allowed to keep you from having the life you want)

• value your growth and can not stand selling yourself short enough that you are are willing to do whatever it takes to have what you want — you will never let “too hard,” “too expensive,” “easier to just keep doing things the way I have been all along” stop you

• be willing to at-the-very-freaking-least give every suggestion I make the old college try (preferably sans judgment, minus skepticism, or and with not-even-a-touch-of complaint)

• refuse to give up — pretty much ever

• don’t mind swearing, off-color jokes, insulting the latest manufactured pop culture (sorry — comes with the brilliant-insights-and-out-of-the-box-thinking package)

Recognize yourself in the second description? Ready to change your life for the better? And either really brave or a big-time masochist? Just fill out my contact form letting me know where you need some help. We’ll talk on the phone, I’ll explain how I work and answer all your questions — and then together, you and I are going to kick the CRAP out of your life! (In a good way!)

You want guaranteed success? you have to commit to the process – that means you must:

• give every new concept, every contrary perspective, every weirdo suggestion a legitimate try…
• …while committing to being fully present and engaged in the process — no half-assing allowed!

• do the fucking work — use the tools, ask yourself, the questions, complete the tasks, take the steps…
• …and when you don’t, be totally honest about what you allowed to trip you up and why

• understand that it takes a million cumulative-often-imperceptible changes to create a new you…
• …as you patiently play the long authenticity game, rather than seeking a quick fix or miracle cure

• evaluate everything based on current evidence — not past presumption or future supposition…
• …and don’t allow previous mistakes or down-the-road goals to stop you enjoying the journey

• accept that you’ll get there when you’re ready to get there, regardless of how hard you push…
• …and stop worrying about reaching a particular fucking goal by a particular fucking deadline…

• be willing to openly explore those deep dark nasty places in your psyche that you’ve avoided…
• …viewing your perceived shortcomings sans judgment — remember your job is to grow, not label

• trade celebrating big victories for reveling in every single daily-bit-by-bit-tiny-win step forward…
• …while trying your damnedest to stop denigrating your efforts or second-guessing your choices

Whatcha Gonna Get From Me

I’m here to serve as a facilitator, cheerleader, outside-the-box thinker, ass-kicker, and problem-solver — but let’s be fair, you’ve got to do the actual work. I only WISH that I could change your whole fucking life for you, without you having to lift a finger!

(It’d sure make my job a hell of a lot easier!)

With that in mind, there’s no way I can guarantee specific end results like “you’ll find your soul mate” or “you’ll land the job of your dreams” or “you’ll never self-sabotage a new year’s resolution again.” (No one can — and anyone who claims to be able to is feeding you a line of bullshit.)

But what I will guarantee is that if you fully commit to the process, you’ll walk away with:

• a clear-as-a-crystal-fucking-stream vision of what “true” looks like for you — what you desire and why you desire it in every area of your life, what you authentically value, and why you’ve maybe not been doing such a hot job of living up to those aspirations

• a sobering understanding of all the ways you’ve been selling yourself short in the name of some societally-prescribed-virtue-that’s-actually-a-vice bullshit — like:
  • “caring-what-folks-think-to-such-an-extreme-that-you-end-up-censoring-every-move-you-make-every-thought-you-have-and-every-word-that-comes-out-of-your-mouth”
  • “such-a-strong-protestant-work-ethic-sense-of-self-reliance-that-you-refuse-to-ask-for-help-or-enroll-others-in-your-dreams-and-end-up-sabotaging-your-own-best-efforts”
  • “bending-and-folding-your-psyche-so-you-fit-inside-someone-else’s-box-to-the-point-that-everything-hurts-and-you-don’t-even-recognize-yourself-in-the-mirror-anymore”
  • “lack-of-confidence-masquerading-as-humility-and-a-stunningly-counterproductive-tendency-toward-subverting-your-own-needs-in-favor-of-people-pleasing”
  • “always-needing-to-appear-good-or-put-together-or-conscientious-or-responsible-or-whatever-the-hell-you-think-the-masses-want-to-see-rather-than-just-being-real”
  • “climbing-ye-olde-ladder-of-success-to-the-tippy-top-then-looking-around-at-the-view-and-realizing-the-damn-thing’s-been-leaning-against-the-wrong-wall-the-whole-time”
  • “not-making-waves-so-hard-that-you-end-up-sitting-in-the-middle-of-a-dead-calm-sea-having-lost-all-sight-of-who-you-really-are-and-going-absolutely-flipping-nowhere”
  • “using-strength-as-a-façade-to-hide-your-emotions-or-protect-your-vulnerable-side-from-getting-hurt-then-wondering-why-you-feel-numb-and-frozen-and-dead-inside”
  • “devoting-all-your-time/talent/energy-to-meeting-everyone-else’s-expectations-rather-than-creating-the-necessary-space-for-that-which-your-soul-requires-to-be-at-peace”
  • “trimming-away-all-the-bits-of-yourself-that-pop-culture-has-taught-you-are-ugly-or-inappropriate-or-unacceptable-until-finally-you’re-not-even-sure-if-you-still-exist-at-all”
  • “shambling-along-chasing-after-the-‘Murican-Dream-amid-a-herd-of-misguided-zombies-who-exist-in-a-state-of-unconscious-brokeness-disconnect-and-overwhelm-while-you’re-desperately-trying-to-shake-yourself-awake-and-live-a-truly-authentic-life”

• goals that excite and energize and motivate you, that get you excited to jump out of bed and face the day, that you don’t have to beat your head bloody to accomplish

• a concrete-step-by-step-completely-customized-to-suit-your-magnificent-psychological-weirdities-and-glorious-personality-quirks action plan for making each dream a reality

• a lifetime-or-until-you-get-tired-of-me-whichever-comes-first accountability partner — someone whose sole purpose is to keep you on track, aimed in the right direction, minus self-created bullshit or drama or excuses, moving ever forward toward your ideal self

I can’t promise that your life will ever be perfect. (‘Cuz what-the-fuck-does-that-really-mean-anyway??) But I can promise that it will be drastically-radically BETTER — once you have the inner-and-outer-tools you need to stay awake and aware, to keep making tiny incremental improvements every single day until you die. And really, what more could one ask?

If you fall into one of the following categories, we were DEFINITELY made for each other:

• you’re tired of being a “wannapreneur” and finally ready to be an entrepreneur

• you’re running a business on your own with or minimum help, and want to learn fixes you can implement on your own

• you’re committed to growing your business even though your resources are limited

• you’re tired of the chaos/overwhelm and to simplify, declutter, get organized

• you’re dissatisfied with the life you’ve been handed — and are ready for something different

• you’re looking to start a new business — or take your existing company to the next level

• you’re a would-be public speaker — and you needs help crafting, honing, or marketing your talks

• you’re a budding author — but you struggle to get your words down on paper and out into the world

• you’re artistically-inclined — needing creative inspiration, process-improvement, business-side help

• you’re searching for ways to turn their ideas/expertise into innovative and marketable products

• you’re part of a group hosting public/private event that could use an entertaining-yet-educational presenter

• you’re part of a publication in search of fresh new content, written in a down-to-earth-keeping-it-real voice

• you’re a member of a book club that enjoys YA, memoirs, snarky-social-commentary, or self-improvement genres

• you’re part of an organization looking for a documentary photographer with an eye for striking composition

• you’re an individual who would like unique candid portraiture series (family, friends, kids, pets)

• you’re a collector of funky, thought-provoking artwork or in the market for a commissioned piece

• you’re a potential RVer trying to get out on the road (whether full-time, part-time, for work or fun)

• you’re a wanderluster interested in trip-planning, travel-writing, or making globetrotting easier

I’m also open to considering anything that I haven’t considered here, that sounds like fun and you think I’d be good at it. Yay you — done talking about change, and ready to finally actually do something about it. Now are you ready to unleash your inner name-taking-ass-kicker?

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